Tweets I Should've Twat
-On an empty four-lane road, "you know the thing about Florida is that the roads are always crowded here.”
-Monday, Wednesday, Friday- Kinasta, Tuesday, Thursday, Saturday, Bridge. Sunday- Water Aerobics.
-It is horribly embarrassing when you walk into a restaurant at 5:30 with your Grandma with two of her friends and a teenage girl younger than you seats you at your table.
-Popular to contrary belief, the flea market only has clothes for the 65+; there are no stores for teenagers.
-They still sell the scrunchy shirts at the Flea Market that were all the rage in 1998. (Dear Grandma, they aren’t in style anymore).
-The most appealing thing at the flea market- $9.99 sugar lips in EVERY color!!!! (For all of you who don’t get my sarcasm, this isn’t appealing).
-"The Needlepoint store opens at 9:30 and it gets crowded by 10 so we have to be there at 9:30."
-Even though it is 81 degrees when you go out to dinner at 5:30 it is necessary and mandatory to be wearing long pants and a long sleeve shirt.
-Apparently it is acceptable in Boca to merge lanes without looking and using turn signals. And they say the Florida townies are bad drivers. #Oldfolks
-It is also acceptable to look at the boy your age with his Grandparents and share a roll of the eyes because you both just know how the other one is feeling.
-My grandma thinks that I can hear her when my headphones are on...
-Meet a woman at the pool..."she is such a goy,"-Grandma. The next day, "I was wrong! She converted, she is Jewish!"
-Flakowitz’s Deli- A much, much, much older version of Max and Benny’s. The waitresses even have to lift the men out of their wheelchairs into the real chairs.
-If you see an ethnic person in a gated community, they are probably someone’s caretaker.
-"The people drive so fast here." Nope that is just them driving the speed limit Grandma.
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